motherhood

Mother's Day 2010

I like what my pastor said this morning:

Have a great marriage first, then let children be an addition to it.

The best thing you can give your children is a healthy, happy marriage.

and Proverbs 27:12, "The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it."

In many ways that verse sums up a lot of our life and raising children as well. Being prudent means being foresightful and planning ahead. When you see danger, you take action. I even see this with Tim making a career change. He is being foresightful that we could have kept going that course and then paid for it later... probably emotionally and financially. It's such a good verse to set some guardrails for your life and marriage.

This Mother's Day made me a little emotional for the first time. I think with having two children and seeing them really start to grow, learn, and seeing fruit from the discipline... made me misty-eyed. The pastor's wife also shared a verse for mothers that hit me also, from Nehemiah's story:" I am doing a good work and I cannot come down." I feel like I say "no" a lot to plans, opportunities, and desires. Because of the work raising children, I miss out. But, this verse affirms that I AM doing a good work and I can't do everything else!! These 2 little angels, for this season of my life, are my joy and my responsibility. They are my work.

I also really have felt the sacrifices that come from being a mother. It has truly changed me as a person and made me live sacrificially for the ones I love. And I love that. From early childhood, all I ever wanted was to be a mommy. I know the hardships of miscarriage, twin pregnancies, and the anxiety of just getting and being pregnant! I never take any moment with my babies for granted because I know what a miracle they are. I sneak in their rooms every night to pull the covers up one more time and kiss them on the cheek.

But the cost.... the sacrifice..... it's hard not to get selfish sometimes. I think about my current situation. We are homeless, jobless, and my husband is about to be a full time student. My current dreams of buying another home, having another baby, and moving forward are going to be delayed. For about 6 months we will be in limbo as we rent and get to where Tim will be employed. I think about what I want, what I want to do..... Luckily, it's not all about me. Sometimes to get where you want, you have to sacrifice. And that's where I am this year.

Like that verse, we have not always gotten what we want easily. Motherhood may not come easy for you, but God hears your prayers. Raising children, your husband finding his life career, or moving.... God is always with us.

I thank the Lord for both of our mothers who model before us what a godly mother is. And I thank my sweet husband for all his sacrifice to let me live out my dream. Currently, I want to repay the favor to him.